Zaka 20 Pambuyo pake: Kuvomereza kwa Munthu Wosiya Chikumbumtima

Wolemba Alexandria Shaner, World BEYOND War, March 26, 2023

Patha zaka 20 kuyambira mabodza ndi kusokoneza zomwe zinachititsa kuti US iwononge Iraq ku 2003. Ndatsala pang'ono kutembenuza zaka 37 ndipo zinandikhudza: zochitika zimenezo zaka 20 zapitazo ndi momwe ndinayambira ulendo wanga wandale, ngakhale kuti sindinachitepo kanthu. dziwani panthawiyo. Monga a wochita zachitukuko, munthu sachedwa kutsogolera ndi: "Ndili wachinyamata, ndinalowa m'gulu la Marines" ... koma ndinatero.

Pamphambano za moyo wanga monga mwana wasukulu ya sekondale ndikukhala kunja kwa NYC pa 9/11 ndi kuukira kwa Afghanistan, ndi moyo wanga monga Woimira Marine Corps Oimira M'zaka zoyambirira za nkhondo ya US ku Iraq, ndinayambitsa mosadziwa. ndekha kuti ndisiye. Zatenga nthawi, koma ndikutha kudzifotokoza ndekha ndi mawu akuti, kusiya, ndi ulemu. Sindine msilikali wankhondo, kapenanso wokana kulowa usilikali chifukwa cha chikumbumtima - mwina ndine wosiya usilikali chifukwa cha chikumbumtima. Sindinasaine pamzere wamadontho kuti ndigwire ntchito ndipo sindinaimedwe kukhoti lankhondo kapena kutsekeredwa m'ndende chifukwa chosiya chipembedzo changa. Sindinafunikire kuthawa ndi kukabisala kuti nditetezeke. Sindinapiteko kunkhondo. Koma ndinazindikira zimene asilikali amakumana nazo ndi kumvetsa, ndiponso zimene amaletsedwa kumvetsa.

Ndili ndi zaka 17, ndinafunsira maphunziro a ku yunivesite ya Marine Corps koma sindinaipeze. Ndinataya mnyamata yemwe pambuyo pake anakhala mnzanga wapamtima panthawi ya maphunziro. Mofanana ndi ine, iye anali wanzeru, wothamangitsidwa, wothamanga, ndipo ankafunitsitsa kuchita chilichonse chimene angathe kuti dziko likhale labwinopo. Mosiyana ndi ine, iye anali wamwamuna, womangidwa ngati thanki ya ku America, atagwedezeka kale, ndipo anali ndi bambo yemwe anali Msilikali wokongoletsedwa. Chabwino, ine ndikanaziwona izo zikubwera. Kumawonekedwe onse, ndinali wosangalatsa 110 lbs. za zolinga zabwino kuchokera ku banja la ophunzira. Sindinavomereze kukana koyamba ndikuwonetsa ku Virginia mulimonse, ndinayamba maphunziro, ndinamaliza 'sabata la gehena', ndikukakamiza kupita ku Marine Officer Candidate njanji pa pulogalamu ya ROTC ya University of Virginia yophunzira ubale wapadziko lonse ndi Chiarabu.

Ndinkaganiza kuti ndikuyambitsa njira yothandiza anthu komanso yachikazi komwe ndikanathandizira kumasula anthu a ku Afghanistan ndi Iraq, makamaka amayi, ku nkhanza zachipembedzo ndi zaulamuliro, komanso kuthandizira kutsimikizira kunyumba kuti amayi akhoza kuchita chilichonse chimene amuna angachite. A Marines anali aakazi pafupifupi 2% panthawiyo, otsika kwambiri mwa azimayi ogwira ntchito m'nthambi zonse zankhondo zaku US, ndipo chinali chiyambi chabe cha azimayi kuloledwa kulowa nawo nkhondo. Olakwika? Ndithudi. Zolinga zoipa? Ayi. Ndinali ndi maloto oyenda ndi ulendo ndipo mwinanso kutsimikizira ndekha, monga wachinyamata aliyense.

M’chaka choyamba, ndinaphunzira mokwanira kuti ndiyambe kufunsa mafunso. UVA sichidziwika chifukwa cha pulogalamu yake yayikulu, mosiyana. Ndilo gawo lolowera ku DC / Northern Virginia kukhazikitsidwa. Ndinamaliza digiri ya International Relations ndipo sindinawerengepo Chomsky, Zinn, kapena Galeano - sindimadziwa mayina awo. Ziribe kanthu, malingaliro anga achichepere mwanjira ina adazindikira malingaliro okwanira omwe sanagwirepo, ndi ma equation omwe sanaphatikizepo, kufunsa mafunso. Mafunsowa anayamba kulira, ndipo sindinathe kuwayanjanitsa polankhula ndi anzanga kapena mapulofesa a ROTC, zomwe zinandipangitsa kuti ndiyambe kukayikira mkulu wa gulu langa mwachindunji zokhudzana ndi malamulo a nkhondo ya US ku Iraq.

Ndinapatsidwa msonkhano wachinsinsi mu ofesi ya Major ndikupatsidwa chilolezo cholankhula zanga. Ndinayamba ndi kunena kuti monga oimira usilikali, tinaphunzitsidwa kuti tikapatsidwa ntchito, tidzalumbira kuti tidzamvera ndi kulamula kudzera m’malamulo ambiri ndiponso kutsatira malamulo oyendetsera dziko la United States. Ili linali lingaliro lachipangidwe lomwe tinkayembekezeredwa, makamaka m'lingaliro, kuti timvetse ndi kuziyika mkati. Kenako ndinafunsa a Major kuti ndikanatani, monga msilikali wotsatira malamulo oyendetsera dziko, kulamula ena kuti aphe ndi kuphedwa chifukwa cha nkhondo yomwe inali yosagwirizana ndi malamulo? Imeneyi inali nthawi yotsiriza yomwe ndinali mkati mwa nyumba ya ROTC. Sanandiuze n’komwe kuti ndibwerere kudzanditengera nsapato ndi zida zanga.

Kukambitsirana kunayambika moona mtima, kufunafuna mayankho kwa osayankhidwa, mwamsanga kunachititsa kuti ndikhale chete ndi “kuchotsedwa kwanga mogwirizana” m’programu. Atangochoka paulamuliro wa pakamwa panga, funso langa linasinthidwa kukhala chilengezo cha "kusiya". Akuluakulu a gululo ayenera kuti adawona kuti zingakhale bwino kunditumiza nthawi yomweyo, kusiyana ndi kuyesa kundisunga mpaka ndidzakhala vuto lalikulu pambuyo pake. Mwachiwonekere sindinali Marine awo oyamba kukhala ndi mafunso olakwika. Monga Erik Edstrom akuti, Un-American: Kuwerengera kwa Msilikali wa Nkhondo Yathu Yaitali Kwambiri, “Ndinaphunzitsidwa kuganiza za mmene ndingapambanire mbali yanga yaing’ono yankhondo, osati kaya tiyenera kumenya nawo nkhondo.”

Ndikuyamba kucheza ndi a Major, ndidakhala ndikukangana ndi zovuta zamakhalidwe osagwirizana ndi malamulo okhudzana ndi nkhondo, zomwe zinali zisanachitikepo ndisanaphunzire. Zodziwika bwino zaukadaulo zinali momwe ndidakwanitsa kutenga chinthu chowoneka bwino kuti ndithane nacho - motsata malamulo. Ngakhale makhalidwe anali pamtima pavuto langa, ndinali wotsimikiza kuti ngati nditapempha kuti ndilankhule ndi mkulu wathu ndikumuuza kuti zokopa za Middle East zinkawoneka ngati zolakwika, komanso zolakwika ngati cholinga chinali kulimbikitsa demokalase ndi ufulu kunja. , Ndikanandichotsa mosavuta ndikuuzidwa kuti ndipite kukawerenga zomwe mkulu wina wachiroma analemba za “ngati mukufuna mtendere, konzekerani nkhondo”.

Ndipo kunena zoona, ndinali ndisanadzikhulupirirebe kuti ndinali wolondola pa kukayikira kwanga. Ndinali ndi ulemu waukulu kwa anzanga mu pulogalamuyi, omwe onse ankawoneka kuti amakhulupirirabe kuti anali panjira yotumikira anthu. Khomo lalamulo lalamulo, ngakhale linali locheperako, linali chinthu chomwe ndimatha kutseka mwanzeru ndikumamatira mfuti zanga. Inali njira yanga yotulukira, ponse paŵiri m’lingaliro laumisiri ndi zimene ndinatha kudziuza ndekha. Ndikayang'ana m'mbuyo tsopano, ndiyenera kudzikumbutsa kuti ndinali ndi zaka 18, ndikuyang'anizana ndi USMC Major yemwe sakugwirizana ndi gawoli, kuyankhula motsutsana ndi zomwe anzanga onse ndi anthu ammudzi angavomereze, motsutsana ndi mgwirizano waukulu wa dziko langa, ndi zotsutsana ndi dziko langa. malingaliro ake a cholinga ndi chidziwitso.

Zowonadi, ndidazindikira kuti ndakhala ndikupusitsidwa kopusa kuti ndikaphunzira chilankhulo ndi chikhalidwe, ndimatha kungolowa m'dziko lachilendo ngati filimu ya wapolisi wanzeru ndikupeza "anthu oyipa" ochepa omwe ayenera kukhala. kugwira anthu awo ku ukapolo ku lingaliro lachikhazikitso, kutsimikizira anthu omwe tinali kumbali yawo (mbali ya "ufulu"), ndi kuti adzagwirizana nafe, mabwenzi awo atsopano a ku America, pochotsa opondereza awo. Sindinaganize kuti zikanakhala zophweka, koma ndi kulimba mtima kokwanira, kudzipereka, ndi luso mwinamwake ndinali m'modzi mwa "Ochepa, Onyada", omwe ayenera kulimbana ndi zovutazo, chifukwa ndikanatha. Zinali ngati ntchito.

Sindinali chitsiru. Ndinali wachinyamata wodzimva kuti ndinabadwira m’banja laulemu ndipo ndinkafunitsitsa kuti dziko likhale malo abwinoko, n’kumaona kuti kutumikira Mulungu n’kofunika kwambiri kuposa ine. Ndinalemba malipoti a m'mabuku okhudza FDR ndi kulengedwa kwa UN ndili mwana ndipo ndinali kukonda lingaliro la gulu ladziko lonse lomwe limakhala ndi zikhalidwe zambiri zomwe zimakhala mwamtendere. Ndinkafuna kutsata zomwe ndimachita.

Inenso sindinali wotsatira. Sindimachokera kubanja lankhondo. Kulowa m'gulu la Marines kunali kupanduka; chifukwa chodziyimira ndekha kuyambira ndili mwana komanso kuti ndikhale "wamphamvu kwambiri kwa mtsikana", chifukwa chofuna kudziwonetsa ndekha, ndikudzifotokozera ndekha. Kunali kupandukira chinyengo cha chifunga koma chokwiyitsa chomwe ndidamva pakati pa anthu omasuka, apakati. Popeza ndisanakumbukire, malingaliro a chisalungamo chofalikira adalowa m'dziko langa ndipo ndimafuna kulimbana nawo. Ndipo ndinkakonda pang'ono zoopsa.

Potsirizira pake, mofanana ndi anthu ambiri a ku America, ndinali mchitidwe wamalonda wankhanza umene unandichititsa kukhulupirira kuti kukhala Msilikali wa Panyanja ndiyo njira yabwino koposa ndiponso yolemekezeka kwambiri yopezera dziko lapansi monga chisonkhezero chabwino. Chikhalidwe chathu chankhondo chinandipangitsa kufuna kutumikira, popanda kuloledwa kukayikira amene ndinali kutumikira kapena kukwaniritsa cholinga chake. Boma lathu lidandifunsa kuti ndidziperekere nsembe kotheratu ndi kukhulupirika kwakhungu ndipo silinapereke chowonadi pobwezera. Ndinali wofunitsitsa kuthandiza anthu moti sindinkadziwa kuti asilikali amagwiritsidwa ntchito pozunza anthu m’malo mwa maboma. Mofanana ndi achinyamata ambiri, ndinkadziona kuti ndine wanzeru, koma m’njira zambiri ndinali ndidakali mwana. Zoyimira, kwenikweni.

M’miyezi yoyambirira ya maphunziro amenewo, ndinali nditasemphana maganizo kwambiri. Kufunsa sikumangokhalira kutsutsana ndi chikhalidwe cha anthu, komanso ndimbewu yanga. Kudekha kwanthawi yayitali komwe tsiku lina ndidadzutsa Woimira Wapolisiyo kenako ndikugona - palibe kanthu - kunali kovutirapo. Zikadakhala zosavuta pakadakhala ndewu, kuphulika kwina kapena kumenyera zifukwa zodziwikiratu chipwirikiti chamkati - kugwa komanso kutayika kwa anthu. Ndinachita manyazi kukhala "wosiya". Ndinali ndisanasiyepo kalikonse m’moyo wanga. Ndinali wophunzira wamba, wothamanga wa Olympic, ndinamaliza maphunziro a kusekondale mwamsanga semesita, ndipo ndinali ndikukhala ndikuyenda ndekha. Zokwanira kunena, ndinali wachinyamata wankhanza, wonyada, ngati mwina ndinali wouma mutu kwambiri. Kudzimva ngati munthu wosiya ntchito komanso wamantha kwa anthu omwe ndinkawalemekeza kwambiri kunali koopsa. Kusakhalanso ndi cholinga chomwe chinapangitsa mantha ndi ulemu ngati kutha.

Mwakuya, momvetsa chisoni kwambiri, ndinadziŵabe kuti kusiya kunali koyenera. Pambuyo pake, nthawi zonse ndimadzinong'oneza mwachinsinsi, "simunasiye chifukwa chake, chifukwa chakusiyani". Lingakhale bodza kunena kuti ndinali ndi chidaliro kapena momveka bwino za kupanga izi. Ndinalankhula mokweza kamodzi kokha kwa makolo anga aliyense powafotokozera chifukwa chimene ndinasiya asilikali a m’madzi, ndipo kwa nthawi yaitali palibe wina aliyense.

Sindinakambiranepo poyera za zomwe ndakumana nazo ndi asitikali, ngakhale ndayamba kugawana nawo pazokambirana zomwe ndikuganiza kuti ndizothandiza. Kulankhula ndi omenyera nkhondo akale komanso okana usilikali chifukwa cha chikumbumtima ndi Russian refuseniks, ndipo tsopano posindikizidwa, ndapereka nkhani yanga pofuna kuthandizira kutsimikizira kuti nthawi zina kukana kumenyana ndi chinthu cholimba mtima komanso chothandiza kwambiri chomwe munthu angachite kuti apeze mtendere ndi chilungamo. Si njira ya munthu wamantha wodzikonda, monga momwe anthu amachitira kaŵirikaŵiri. Monga momwe kulili ulemu ndi ulemu m’ntchito zautumiki, pali ulemu ndi ulemu m’mchitidwe wokana nkhondo yosalungama.

Nthaŵi ina ndinali ndi lingaliro losiyana kwambiri la zimene kumatanthauza m’ntchito kutumikira cholinga cha chilungamo, chachikazi, ngakhalenso cha mayiko ndi mtendere. Zimandikumbutsa kuti ndisakhale oweruza kapena olekanitsidwa ndi anthu omwe ali ndi malingaliro osiyanasiyana, chifukwa ndimadziwira ndekha kuti ngakhale titaganiza kuti tikuchita zinthu kuti dziko likhale labwino, ngati kumvetsetsa kwathu momwe dziko limagwirira ntchito kumabisika kwambiri. adzachita zinthu zosiyanasiyana potsatira mfundo zofanana. Pali zambiri zomwe anthu aku America ali nazo ufulu wosaphunzira, ndipo ndi mtundu watsopano wa ntchito ndi ntchito thandizani izi kuti zichitike.

Zaka 20 ndi maphunziro ena ovuta kwambiri pambuyo pake, ndikumvetsetsa kuti nthawi imeneyi m'moyo wanga inandithandiza kuti ndipitirize kukayikira momwe dziko limagwirira ntchito, osati kuopa kutsutsana ndi tirigu, Tsata choonadi, ndi kukana chosalungama ngakhale makamaka pamene izo utoto monga zachilendo kapena zosapeweka, ndi kufunafuna njira zabwino. Kukhulupirira matumbo anga, osati TV.